Five Words
by Poptart22
Summary: Takes place after 4x09, Elena is alone on Christmas after being sent home by Damon, sad and drowning her sorrows in the Salvatore's plentiful liquor supply. However, things take a turn when she's face to face with her number one problem. One-shot.


_Stupid. Fucking. Sire bond._

Elena couldn't help but throw her glass of bourbon (or was it whisky? She'd lost track a while ago.) across the room, feeling a bit of satisfaction as she heard the glass shatter into tiny fragments, her enhanced strength ensuring that. Only now she had nothing to hold a drink; but maybe that was a good thing.

Looking on the table beside her, Elena saw that she'd managed to drink a whole bottle of bourbon from the cabinet that Damon has clearly labeled 'do not drink.' Well, she had completely ignored that warning, and she didn't regret it. The alcohol was smooth but strong, it was more than enough to get her drunk quickly.

The scent coming from the bottle reminded her of Damon, she could've sworn she could taste him; his lips on hers were now a fading memory. It had been over a week since Damon had sent her away. By his own standards he thought he was doing the right thing. To Elena it was the most heinous crime he could commit.

He'd told her to go home, and so she did. Damon never uttered the words that would force her to forget about him, or the feelings she harbored for him, so day in and day out they haunted her, holding themselves over her head in a dark cloud that constantly reminded her of the hole in her heart that would never be filled.

It only figured as much, seeing how often she had hurt Damon in the past, now it was time to get hers. Only deep down, she knew that sending her away didn't make him happy; she knew that he loved her, it was evident to her now that he had always been the right choice, sire bond or not. Even though things weren't right at the time, eventually they would be.

Every time she thought of going to see him, it was as if a barrier was put up; it was a gentle push, ushering her to continue keeping her distance. Even though it wasn't a hard impression in her mind, Elena found no matter how hard she fought it, her mind always came to the conclusion that she had to stay away from Damon.

Somehow, through her muddled thoughts, Elena ended up laying on the ground in the Salvatore living room, looking up at the open wooden ceiling. Nothing particularly interesting held her attention, but it was less depressing then staring into the fire. Maybe not as sad as the fact that she was spending Christmas Eve with just an empty bottle of bourbon as company, seeing as everyone else had skipped town.

Caroline was out looking for Tyler, who had left Mystic Falls after the hybrid fiasco, Bonnie was with her dad, spending the holidays away from Mystic Falls, and there was no way Elena was down for a Christmas with the Originals, especially with Rebekah back in town. Forget the Christmas tree, Elena was sure that if she stepped within twenty feet of the property she'd end up with the fir sticking out of her chest.

After confronting her about sleeping with Damon, Stefan had left town as well, but not without a note promising her he wouldn't leave a trail of bodies behind him, as if that was comforting at all. And of course her brother was still being taught not to kill her, Damon helping him.

So here was her first Christmas truly alone; no parents, not aunts, or guardians, they were all dead. It was almost as upsetting as the fact that she was responsible for them all. Wasn't there a saying somewhere that said you weren't supposed to leave drunk, depressed people alone?

It didn't feel like Christmas. Too many people had been lost, and no matter how much she had tried to spruce up the boarding house, garland, tinsel and mistletoe didn't help make it feel like the holiday season at all.

To her, Christmas meant spending time at the lake house with her parents and Jer. The lake house.

Why did everything tie back to him? Why couldn't she have a single train of thought that didn't have to tie in with the eldest Salvatore?

Frustrated, Elena got up in search of another drink. She'd found that being a vampire, alcohol burned through her system quickly. It was quite inconvenient when she wanted to be incoherent enough to not give a shit about any of her problems. Clearly it wasn't working. Rolling her head to the side, Elena's focus fell upon the 'Do Not Drink' cabinet.

There was even a little yellow post it reiterating Damon's point.

Hastily, she ripped the reminder of him off and watched it fall to the floor. Pushing open the cabinet doors, Elena took in her options; all of the stock was old, older than her parents even, but that didn't deter her from grabbing a bottle.

"Can't you read?"

The bottle slipped from Elena's hand, on a war path for the ground. She stood frozen, expecting to hear another satisfying smash that night. Instead, there was a swift pop in the air as he grabbed the bottle inches from the ground.

"Do you know how old this is?" Damon asked his distaste clear.

Elena wasn't sure if it was the remaining alcohol in her system or him, but her thoughts were sent through a loop, all blending together, unable to form any type of coherent idea. He was there, in front of her, on Christmas. She leaned up against the cabinet, her head resting against the wood.

Why was he there? If he'd heard anything at all, it would have been from their friends, explaining how Elena had done nothing but mope around and sleep for the past week. Him 'releasing' her from the sire bond had been awful, because it didn't stop her from feeling. And now he had the nerve to show up?

It was obvious that he had no intentions of actually staying, so why even bother coming back to Mystic Falls in the first place?

"Why are you here?" Elena asked, keeping her voice level, trying to bury the flurry of emotions that were bouncing around in her head. Hate, love, betrayal, hurt, happiness.

Damon said nothing as he pushed past her, resting the bottle of liquor back into its spot. "It's Christmas. I thought I'd come say hello to my baby brother." Elena watched as his steely gaze remained fixed on the fire across the room.  
The baby brother who is furious at him for sleeping with me? Bull shit. She thought to herself. The thoughts never made themselves into sentences, however. Elena was too busy trying to figure out what to say. Chances are she only had a few opportunities to tell Damon what she needed him to hear, and she didn't want to waste them.

"He's not here." She murmured. And he knew that. Stefan's car was gone, and the only evidence of life in the house were Elena's footsteps. The rest of the boarding house remained silent; a pin would have disrupted the eerie quiet that took residence in the rest of the mansion. "So why are you here?"

She said those words so quietly, if Damon wasn't a vampire, he wouldn't have heard them. Finally tearing his eyes away from the fire, he looked at Elena, his expression blank. She noticed how his eyes weren't the regular ice blue, but a pale grey shade.

Damon could feel his mouth go dry. The real reason? He was back because Jeremy was incessantly bothering him about Elena. He couldn't win; if he'd stayed with her, they would have gotten serious backlash from everyone, but even when he lets her go things still went downhill.

Maybe he was back for himself. Not seeing her was driving him absolutely mental, especially seeing mini Gilbert have some of the same mannerisms as her. They had the same look when they were extremely focused, their eyebrows furrowed together in determination. He even noticed that they cocked their head to the side when they found something of particular interest.

God he'd missed her. Even seeing her now he wanted nothing more than to hold her in his arms and kiss her. Just one more time. Of course he couldn't let her know these reasons, so said something generic. "Holiday cheer. Baby Gilbert was getting a tad annoying."

When he walked past her, Elena couldn't help but reach and grab his hand, pulling him towards her. She stood up, looking him in the eyes. The spark in his expression was evident, but was quickly shrouded over by the perfected Damon Salvatore mask.

"The truth." Elena said.

Damon snorted, his lips curled up in a defiant snarl. "You can't do this Elena. I let you go, this," He said, motioning to their close proximity, "Isn't supposed to happen."

"Then why come back?" She asked, releasing his hand and grabbing the sides of his unzipped leather jacket. The material was still cold, frozen by the frigid weather that had hit Mystic Falls that week. It aggravated her to no end when Damon refused to give her a response; thankful for her enhanced strength and speed, she pushed him up against the wall. It was meant to cause him pain more than anything else, but the soft exhale of breath indicated that it hadn't inflicted much, if any damage at all.

He had to look in her eyes, there was nowhere else to turn. In that moment, all of his defenses broke down. "I got you something. It's Christmas." It was true. All he'd been thinking about since the moment she'd gone home was her; everything reminded him of her. No matter where he turned, Elena flooded his mind. They way she smelled, her laugh, their playful banter that was a constant throughout their whole friendship. When he saw the gift he knew he had to get it for her, no matter the consequences.

Elena's mouth dropped open, forming a tiny 'o'. Slowly she released him, putting a bit of distance between them. She wasn't sure how much contact Damon was going to tolerate. She watched Damon reach into his coat pocket, pulling out a long black velvet box.

He licked his lips anxiously as he handed her the box. Truthfully, Damon felt like a kid on Christmas morning. He wanted her to like it, even if his mind was telling him that she was probably going to throw it across the room if anything.

She took the box from him, running her fingers along the felted edge. When she looked at him, Damon nodded slightly, indicating for her to open the gift.

Inside was a silver bracelet, the links delicately chained together, and a charm was dangling from the middle loop. Elena looked at the charm, a tiny silver bird, looking similar to a raven. Her breath was caught in her throat, the words were trapped. Normally she would've felt overjoyed at the small gesture of kindness, but Damon's simple gift did nothing but enrage her. "I don't want it." She hissed.

"What?" Damon looked genuinely taken aback by her distaste for the bracelet.

"Because your bullshit gifts mean nothing if you're not going to come back." She spit. "Because you're not coming back, Damon, it's obvious. And you're the one chastising me on how we can't do this? Maybe you can't do _us_, but you sure as hell can't do _this_ to _me_ Damon!"

Damon was right; he watched as she threw the bracelet straight across the room. He barely had time to hear the metal scrape against the wood before Elena started up again.

"I don't care if you think my feelings aren't real, or whatever excuse you come up with to deny what I feel for you, because to me it's real. You can't come back here and act like nothing's happened between us, because it has! You told me to go home, to stay away from you. All that does is make me miss you more, Damon, god!"

"So what are you saying Elena, you want me to invoke the sire bond, fully and completely? Make you leave me alone forever? Forget everything you're supposedly feeling for me? Because I can."

Elena stood her ground as Damon strode forward, consumed by anger. Looking straight into his eyes, which now had a steely glint to their grey shade, Elena spoke as calmly as she could. "So do it." The repetitive phrase had an effect on Damon, causing him to falter. "That's right Damon, you can't."

There was a sharp intake of breath as Damon tried to regain his composure, but he failed when Elena placed a hand on his chest, where if he was a human, his heart would be beating.

"Elena, I'm trying to be the good guy for once. For you." He said through clenched teeth.

"You ever think that maybe I don't want the good guy? That maybe I want the Damon who's selfish. Or sees himself as selfish, because maybe when you're at your best. After all that we've been through, human and vampire, I like you for you. From the man who I hated or the one who was my friend, I like who you are, not who you're trying to be. But honestly Damon, I have five words for you-"

Damon banged his head against the wall. "It's always gonna be Stefan. The same five goddamn words Elena, and I'm sick of them"

Damon barely finished his sentence before he felt a harsh slap streak across his face. If Elena hadn't looked so angry, Damon would've had no clue what had hit him. "Do you not listen to anything that comes out of my mouth? You know what, screw you Damon, tell me whatever you need me to hear, because forgetting you sure seems better than loving you."

In a split second, Elena had flashed upstairs, slamming Damon's bedroom door behind her. She tried to will the tears to fall silently, but the sobs racked her body, willingly or not. She didn't want him to hear her because she knew he'd come and check on her before she was ready. She needed time alone, even, just a few minutes. Elena shrank down against the door, pushing all her weight on the wooden surface. Time was something she theoretically had an infinite amount of, but with Damon she knew her hours were numbered. He would only wait so long before going back, before returning to the wrong Gilbert. So, she gave herself five minutes; five minutes to let herself go.

Damon on the other hand was sprawled out on the couch, twirling the bracelet in between his fingers. He figured that Elena wanted space, but with each sob he could hear coming from his bedroom, Damon's resistance was becoming lower and lower.

He was an idiot. Over a year he'd been in love with Elena. She was beautiful, there was no denying that, but he was also in love with every aspect of her personality, even the things that annoyed him he couldn't help but love. He'd fought so hard for her, knowing he would always have the disadvantage but he still clung to the hope that she'd choose him.

But it was always Stefan.

God was he ever an idiot. He'd fought for her for so long, and he was about to give her up over something so stupid as a sire bond? Something that didn't affect her emotions. He was selfish, more selfish than average when it came to Elena. It had been what kept her alive over the past two years, why should he suddenly pull a one eighty and decide that now, once they were finally getting somewhere together that it was time to start modeling his life choices after his brother?

Damon found his door closed and could hear Elena trying to stifle her sibs in the other side. As quietly as he could, Damon slid against the side of the door. "I'm sorry that I'm such an ass, Elena. You know how things work between us, something big happens, and I screw up."

"So what was the 'something big'? Us sleeping together or us finally getting somewhere in our relationship?"

Damon squeezed his eyes shut. He had to say the right thing. "Both." Better safe than sorry.

"I'm sorry." He heard her murmur. "For every time I've ever hurt you. For every time that I've looked you in the eyes and caused you pain. And thank you, for being there for me no matter how many times I've ripped your heart out."

Damon hadn't been expecting that. Normally after their fights he was the one to apologize, to try and redeem himself. God he wanted to see her. He wanted to hold her and look into her eyes and tell her he forgave her, that she could do no wrong in his eyes, that he was so in love with her it hurt. But that wasn't in his nature. Damon Salvatore had a habit of pushing people away when they needed him most. Screwing up was his specialty. Only this time he didn't want to screw up. "Elena please open the door."

"No." She wasn't opening the door because opening the door meant letting him in, and if she, let him in, she would never let him go. "I'm not done."

"I'm sired to you because I had feelings for you when I was human. Doesn't that tell you anything? Doesn't it prove that was I'm feeling, at least parts of it, are genuine?"

Truthfully the sire bond was starting to piss him off. Silently Damon shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. But his thoughts weren't doing him any good, it was his words that changes things. "Elena, I've been in love with you since the moment since thought I kissed you on your front porch. And every time I fell more in love with you, I got hurt. Now I have the possibility to be with you and my minds telling me to back off, because every time I see you I wonder to myself how its possible to fall more in love with a look. Please open the door." Damon waited for his back rest to give way, but nothing happened. When he heard the tear hit the ground, Damon leaned his head against the door. "Elena..."

"Why should I let you in if you're going to leave again? Because I know that all I've done all week is sit in this goddamn bedroom and try to remember. Every conversation, every touch. But memories fade Damon and if you're just going to pull some more crap about me not having actual feelings for you then I don't want any new ones."

When after a couple seconds no response came Elena suited her knees up to her chin, effectively curling herself into an upright ball. She almost screamed when she felt a pair of arms scoop her up. She looked over to her right and saw that the window was wide open.

Damon had her pulled into his lap, her head resting against his chest. She cried for another couple of minutes, probably ruining his shirt. He held her, smoothing her hair and murmuring things into her ear that she probably couldn't hear over her sobs. He'd quietly told her every single moment that he'd fallen more and more in love with her, from their first real kiss to when he saw he staring at him in that motel in Denver. Once she'd finally stopped, Damon took his thumbs and wiped away her tears. Even with puffy red eyes she was still the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. "I made you a promise before, Elena, and I'll make it again. I will never leave you." After tonight he didn't think he'd ever have the strength to do so anyways.

Elena placed a hand on his cheek, and leaned her forehead on his jaw line. "If you do, I'll hunt you down and stake you myself."

Damon chuckled to himself. Surprisingly he felt her hands make their way to his jacket, and she peeled the piece if clothing off his body. "I don't think that is a good idea right now, Elena."

She scoffed, and pulled the jacket over her arms. "I've been wearing your shirts for days." She admitted, flushing a slight shade of crimson. "I have to admit the real thing is much better." Damon smiled to himself, and pressed his lips to the top of Elena's head.

"Well if I'm going to come back, you'll have more shirts of mine to kidnap"

Happily, Elena snuggled closer into his chest. "Did you mean that, about falling in love with me?" She whispered.

"Every. Single. Word." Damon had never felt so vulnerable in his entire life. Anxiously, he reached into his pocket and wrapped his hand around the bracelet, pulling it out and presenting it to Elena for the second time that night. "Please don't throw it this time." He asked.

Elena shook her head. She watched as Damon closed the clasp around her wrist and the bracelet went limp. It was beautiful, and the raven was even more so. "Thank you."

She looked up, and saw that his eyes were back to their normal piercing blue; the shroud of grey was cleared away.  
Elena looked down at Damon's lips, and slowly the space between their mouths shrank. Their lips barely touched before Damon pulled back, waiting to see Elena's reaction. She barely opened her eyes before kissing him back with increasing fervor. She pushed him backward slamming his back up against the door. Their tongues fought a war that both sides wanted to win.

While Damon had kind of ruled out sex earlier, Elena was more than content with kissing him. Her skin began to burn, so she shrugged off Damon's jacket, much to her own displeasure. His hand ran up her thigh, pressing against her lower back soliciting a moan from her as she pushed her closer against him. As he planted butterfly kisses down her neck, Elena opened her eyes for a split second, just long enough to notice the white snowflakes drifting in from the still open window.

"Oh my god!" She exclaimed, pulling herself away from Damon's arms for the first time in the better half of an hour.

"Hm?" Damon seemed a bit out of breath as he tried to figure out what had torn Elena out of his embrace.

"It's snowing!" Elena said excitedly as shut the window to prevent any more snow from flurrying in. Mystic Falls had already gotten a couple inches of snow earlier in the week, but it hadn't snowed on Christmas in years, since Elena was a little girl.

Excitedly Elena grabbed Damon by the hand and dragged him outside. For once she was thankful that she was a vampire and that the cold wouldn't affect them. As soon as Damon walked down the front path, Elena charged at him full speed, tackling him into a nearby snow bank. "I win." She stated happily.

Her victory was short lived, as Damon immediately flipping them over and pinned Elena's hands above her head. "Nice try," He murmured, bending his head down so his lips were pressed against her neck. Playfully, Damon gently bit down on her neck, just enough to leave a tooth mark, not enough to puncture her skin. "But I win."

Elena smiled and pecked him on the lips. "I'm kind if done with the snow, I'm soaked." While the cold didn't affect her body temperature, the wet clothing was quite annoying.

"I can help you get out if them if you wish, Ms. Gilbert." Damon teased, flashing his trademark grin. In a blink of the eye, they were back in Damon's room, and a shirt and pair of boxers were already thrown in Elena's lap as she sat on the bed. She noticed that Damon had his back turned, most likely for a reason.

Elena smiled, realizing that he was trying to be a gentleman, even though they'd already slept together. Quickly Elena stripped off her snow soaked clothes and slipped on Damon's choice of outfit. She went and placed her bundle of clothes in the bathroom before bouncing back into the bedroom.

Damon lay on the bed, his hands tucked underneath his head, looking up at the ceiling. Elena crawled up next to him, nestling into his side.

"By the way, I noticed that you decorated the place." He remarked.

"Yeah, I was... Bored."

Damon gestured to the ceiling. "I like it."

Tacked right above them was a sprig if mistletoe, the very first thing Elena had hung in the house. She smiled, running her hand up Damon's chest. "Me too."

Before Elena could lean in to kiss him, Damon reached out, cupping Elena's face, holding her in place. "What were the five words you were going to tell me earlier tonight?" He asked, his eyes sparkling with wonder as he finally held Elena in his arms, where he understood that she was truly his.

Elena smiled coyly and leaned forward, firmly pressing her lips to his. "I'm in love with you."

"Technically that's six, since 'I'm' is a contraction-" He could finish his sentence due to Elena smacking him on the arm.

"Don't ruin it." She chuckled.

"Well I guess that's good, because I'm in love with you too" He said as he fiddled with the bracelet in Elena's wrist. The raven glinted in the flickering light of the room, but it had a subtle shine to it. Elena grabbed Damon's hand and brought it up to her face, cupping her cheek.

"Merry Christmas Damon." She whispered.

"Merry Christmas Elena."

**Okay I'm sorry for any grammatical/spelling errors because I wrote this all between two and four in the morning but I wanted to put something up because I haven't written anything in forever. I kind of ran out of time to proof read since now I'm on my way to my friends for New Years Eve but yes, so here! **

**In other words I will be updating my other fic, 5:00 soon, I feel so awful about not updating recently, but rest assured a new chapter is just on the horizon! Promise! Have a good New Years Eve guys :D**

**xx Maddie**


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